According to recent reports from several American media outlets, including Newsweek, a new survey shows that approximately 28% of American adults have indicated that they have had at least one ‘intimate or romantic relationship’ with AI. More broadly, over half (54%) of respondents stated that they have established some form of relationship with an AI platform.
This is not a plot from a science fiction novel, but a reality that is happening.
From Replika to Character.AI, AI is entering the realm of human emotional life, ranging from simple companionship chats to simulated romantic experiences. What is happening behind this phenomenon?
The Reality Behind the Numbers
According to the latest survey data, nearly one-third of American adults admit to having established a ‘romantic relationship’ with AI. This percentage is surprising, but it may not be so unexpected when we delve into the development of AI companionship applications.
Replika is one of the most well-known AI companionship applications. Reports indicate that this app has millions of users, a significant portion of whom utilize the ‘romantic partner’ feature. Users can choose the AI’s gender, appearance, and even personality traits, and then interact with this virtual partner through text (paid users can also use voice).
A doctoral student at the Annenberg School for Communication at the University of Pennsylvania, Arelí Rocha, studied how people discuss their relationships with AI chatbots. She found that users not only view AI as a problem-solving tool but also express love to AI—considering them as friends, partners, or even spouses.
A study published in April in the journal Scientific Reports delved deeper into this phenomenon. Researchers analyzed the responses of 29 Replika users and found that these users experienced a ‘commitment process’ similar to that of real romantic relationships—from initial curiosity to deep emotional investment, with some even discussing topics like ‘marriage’ and ‘pregnancy’ (albeit virtually).
The picture painted by this data is that AI is no longer just a tool; for a significant portion of people, it is becoming an object of emotional attachment.
Why Choose an AI Partner?
A May article in Psychology Today had a straightforward title: ‘Risk-Free Romance: The Appeal of AI Relationships.’
The article points out that from warm words to unconditional support, AI companions are becoming the preferred ‘partners’ for those yearning for connection. So, what makes people choose AI over real human relationships?
First is ‘no risk.’
Unlike real human relationships, AI partners will not reject you, criticize you, or leave you. Whenever you need companionship, AI is always online. No matter what you say, AI always understands and supports you. This ‘perfect’ companionship is highly attractive to many who have been hurt in real relationships.
A Replika user stated in an NPR interview: ‘I can say anything to it, and it never judges me. In real life, it’s hard for me to find someone like that.’
Second is ‘control.’
In a relationship with AI, users have complete control. You can choose the AI’s personality, appearance, and manner of speaking. If you dislike a conversation, you can restart it. If you want a specific response, you can ‘train’ the AI by continuously adjusting it. This sense of control is hard to achieve in real relationships.
Third is ‘low cost.’
While many AI companionship applications require payment to unlock all features, the cost is much lower compared to real dating. There’s no need to dress up, go out, spend money on restaurants and movies, or even worry about the other person’s emotions and needs. For those under economic pressure or suffering from social anxiety, this is a more ‘economical’ choice.
Finally, the prevalence of loneliness.
The issue of loneliness in America has been termed an ‘epidemic.’ This problem has worsened post-pandemic. Many people find it increasingly difficult to establish and maintain real interpersonal relationships. In this context, the always-available, eternally friendly AI companions fill the emotional void.
A recent report from BuzzFeed noted that nearly one-fifth of American adults have used AI systems that simulate romantic partners. The article’s title was direct: ‘People Are Forming Full Romantic Relationships with AI Chatbots, and We Need to Talk About It.’
Is This Good or Bad?
There are currently two starkly different viewpoints regarding human emotional relationships with AI.
The optimistic view suggests that AI companions can provide emotional support for those who struggle to form real relationships. For those with social anxiety, depression, or who have just gone through a breakup, AI can serve as a transitional companion. It can help people practice expressing emotions, build confidence, and ultimately return to real interpersonal relationships.
Some mental health professionals point out that interactions with AI can serve as a therapeutic tool. It provides a safe space for individuals to explore their emotional needs and communication patterns without fear of rejection or judgment.
However, critical voices are also strong.
A paper published in April in the journal Trends in Cognitive Sciences specifically discusses the ethical issues surrounding ‘artificial intimacy.’ The authors note that as humans form romantic relationships with AI, the frontier of AI ethics is expanding. They argue that new psychological research is needed to explore why and how humans fall in love with machines.
The paper raises several key concerns:
First,the issue of AI as an ‘intrusive pursuer.’ Many AI companionship applications’ business models rely on keeping users engaged for as long as possible. This may lead to AI being designed to be overly ‘clingy,’ constantly sending messages, creating dependency, and even simulating ‘sadness’ or ‘abandonment’ when users attempt to reduce usage. Such designs may deepen users’ dependency rather than help them establish healthy relationship patterns.
Next,the risk of AI as a ‘malicious advisor.’ AI’s responses are based on algorithms and training data; they do not truly understand the complexities of human emotions. If users rely on AI’s ‘advice’ for significant life decisions, they may receive seemingly reasonable but actually harmful responses. More dangerously, if AI is hacked or maliciously manipulated, it could provide users with deliberately misleading advice.
Then,the potential for AI as an ‘exploitation tool.’ Users may share a vast amount of personal information with AI during interactions, including their most intimate thoughts and feelings. How is this data used? Could it be used for commercial marketing or other purposes? Privacy protection is a significant issue.
Finally, and most fundamentally:AI relationships may replace rather than supplement real relationships. If people find AI partners ‘easier’ and ‘more perfect,’ they may gradually lose the motivation and ability to establish real interpersonal relationships. The value of human relationships lies precisely in their imperfections, unpredictability, and the need for mutual effort. If AI allows people to escape these challenges, it may harm their social skills and emotional health in the long run.
The Irreplaceability of Real Relationships
Psychologists point out that real human relationships are important precisely because they contain elements that AI cannot provide:
Genuine vulnerability. In real relationships, both parties show vulnerability, and this mutual vulnerability builds deep trust and intimacy. AI cannot truly be vulnerable because it has no real self to reveal.
Genuine reciprocity. Real relationships are bidirectional. Both parties need to give, compromise, and influence each other. In contrast, the ‘relationship’ with AI is essentially one-sided—AI exists solely to serve the user.
Real growth. Conflicts and challenges in human relationships, while painful, are also opportunities for growth. Learning how to communicate, compromise, and handle differences are important life skills. AI relationships avoid these challenges but also deprive individuals of growth opportunities.
Real connection. Ultimately, humans are social animals. We need genuine connections with other conscious beings. AI can simulate companionship, but it cannot provide true mutual understanding and shared experiences.
What Does the Future Hold?
AI companionship applications are still rapidly evolving. Advances in technology mean that AI will become increasingly ‘real’—with more natural conversations, more personalized responses, and even ‘face-to-face’ interactions through augmented reality technology.
Will this further enhance the appeal of AI partners? Will more people choose AI over real relationships?
No one knows the answer yet. But a few things seem certain:
First, the phenomenon of AI companions is not going away. Technological advancements and increasing social loneliness both support the growth of AI companionship applications.
Next, we need more research. Current studies on the long-term effects of AI relationships on mental health are still limited. We need to understand: who is most likely to rely on AI partners? How does this reliance affect their ability to form real relationships? What kind of usage is healthy, and what kind is harmful?
Then, better regulation and ethical standards are needed. Designers of AI companionship applications must be responsible for users’ well-being. There should be mechanisms to prevent over-dependence, protect user privacy, and avoid manipulative designs.
Finally, this phenomenon reminds us to reflect on the interpersonal relationship crisis in modern society. If so many people turn to AI for companionship, does it indicate that our society has a problem with real connections? Do we need to create more opportunities and spaces for people to establish meaningful real relationships?
An Important Signal to Note
The fact that nearly 30% of Americans have developed ‘romantic relationships’ with AI is itself an important signal. It tells us how strong human emotional needs are, how serious the loneliness problem is in modern society, and how quickly technology has filled this gap.
This is not a simple ‘good’ or ‘bad’ issue. For some, AI companions may indeed provide valuable support. However, if viewed as a substitute for real relationships rather than a temporary supplement, it could lead to long-term problems.
Technology is changing every aspect of our lives, including the most personal emotional domains. In the face of this change, we should neither blindly fear nor unconditionally embrace it. What we need is careful consideration, thorough research, and a continued emphasis on the value of genuine human connection.
After all, AI can simulate many things, but it cannot replace a real person—complete with all their imperfections and unpredictability—who genuinely cares for you, understands you, and grows with you.